what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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