is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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