i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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