question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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