Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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