let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
