Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize