They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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