I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
