I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
