I think I am morally bankrupt
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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