I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
