I love watching others lives come down to our level.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
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