He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
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I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
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I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
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