hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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