Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
