Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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