Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
