I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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