ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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