The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Randomize
