mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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