i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
