You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
