You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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