Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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