Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I forgot how hot balto sounded
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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