I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
He's on the porch naked. Help.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
