i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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