he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Operation Purity has been aborted
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
