There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He better not be in your backpack
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
