the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
