what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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