Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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