Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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