actually, I'm a sock model
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
We don't watch enough power rangers
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Sorry about my life...
Randomize
