508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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