Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
