i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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