I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I'm having to shit out rocks
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