Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
