Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize
