i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize