I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
