Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
