Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
