marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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