i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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