is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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