I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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